Stymied

The best laid schemes o’ mice an’ men
Gang aft a-gley
        -- Robert Burns


At the end of 1959’s “Some Like it Hot,” Daphne and Osgood Fielding II occupy a speedboat heading for the latters big yacht moored in the bay.

The multimillionaire (portrayed by Joe E. Brown) has fallen head over heels in love with the bass player (Jack Lemmon) – a member of an all-girls band. But he doesn’t know that the object of his affection is actually a male bass player dressed in drag to escape detection by gangsters who know that he is a witness to a murder resembling the St. Valentine’s Day Massacre.

Captivated by Daphne’s charms, Fielding II can’t wait to get to the boat before proposing. Jerry can no longer maintain the deception and comes clean:

“Oh, you don't understand, Osgood! Ehhhh... I'm a man,” he cries over the roar of the engines.

Unaffected by this announcement, the other man announced: “Well, nobody’s perfect!”

My near-perfect road trip hit some bumps this week here in Ontario, Canada. I managed to avoid becoming stuck in Lodi, but Whitby has got the best of me.

The blame doesn’t lie here, though. The problem is about 150 miles east of here. A faulty water pipe flooded the facility I had intended to occupy, forcing a couple of dozen residents to move out.

Repairs are underway, but the guest room has been closed for the season and I’m the odd man out this week in Kingston.

The kind folks here in Whitby have extended my stay for two extra days, so my challenge is to find a headquarters somewhere between Whitby and Nepean for about 72 hours…

When another form of “disaster” struck (in the form of a souped-up pickup truck) on the very first day of this trip, I determined that collisions and any other kind of adversity would be turned into adventure and be seen as an opportunity to add value to the trip.

                Get your motor runnin'
                Head out on the highway
                Lookin' for adventure
                And whatever comes our way
                Yeah Darlin' go make it happen
                Take the world in a love embrace
                Fire all of your guns at once
                And explode into space

                I like smoke and lightning
                Heavy metal thunder
                Racin' with the wind
                And the feelin' that I'm under
                Yeah Darlin' go make it happen
                Take the world in a love embrace
                Fire all of your guns at once
                And explode into space

                Like a true nature's child
                We were born, born to be wild
                We can climb so high
                I never wanna die

                Born to be wild
                        -- Steppenwolf, 1968