Have we met?

Try to remember the kind of September
When life was slow and oh, so mellow.
Try to remember the kind of September
When grass was green and grain was yellow.
Try to remember the kind of September
When you were a tender and callow fellow.
Try to remember, and if you remember,
Then follow.

Deep in December, it's nice to remember,
Although you know the snow will follow.
Deep in December, it's nice to remember,
Without a hurt the heart is hollow.
Deep in December, it's nice to remember,
The fire of September that made us mellow.
Deep in December, our hearts should remember
And follow.
        -- Tom Jones, 1960

Sometimes the phone line goes dead, but we don’t realize the connection has been lost. After a few seconds or minutes, the silence on the other end of the wire becomes more apparent and we finally become aware that our message hasn’t been received.

Though we’ve done nothing wrong, we feel silly – as it should have been obvious that the connection wasn’t open and that we weren’t getting through to the receiver.

On a few occasions, during this tour of retirement facilities, I’ve been engaged in a conversation with someone who seemed to be listening and responding. Then, at some point I realize that this person doesn’t really understand what I am saying, their comments repetitious and not directly related to the topic at hand.

Whether these individuals suffer from Alzheimer’s Disease or some other dementia, it seems pretty clear that memory loss is having a dramatic impact on their quality of life.

As with the errant phone conversation, my initial reaction is embarrassment. I wonder what others at the table were thinking, and wondering whether I’ve been somehow out of line.

It takes a hundred billion nerve cells to make a brain. They all need food; they all have jobs to do producing the electrical energy that makes us think; and they all have to kick off waste and prepare for the next day’s work.

Unfortunately, there are a number of things that can go wrong with this process. It takes a while for enough of those billions of cells to go bad to make a noticeable difference – especially because the symptoms are pretty subjective from the layman’s perspective.

Alzheimer’s affects Five million of us and nearly that many more suffer from other progressive ailments. This population is concentrated mostly among the elderly.

The worst part is that there’s no cure and it’s fatal. It’s the seventh-leading cause of death in the U.S.

I learned a lot more about Alzheimers from the association web site, here.

It does feel right to go ahead and continue a conversation even after it becomes evident that my messages aren’t being decoded effectively – if at all. When the other person is smiling and responding, I have to believe it’s a good thing to share time with other humans.

To be honest, I enjoy conversations more when I’m challenged by the other participants – when the discourse is at a “high” level. And I’m not likely to seek the company of less stimulating tablemates.

I’m sure that says something about me.

Maybe I can be partially redeemed by the fact that I’ve risked (and often suffered) rejection hundreds of times during this trip in an effort to meet and break bread with as many different folks as possible.

I haven’t kept count, but I’m pretty sure my count is at last 1,000 and possibly as high as 1,500. And that’s meeting a lot of folks.

While I’m not much more of an expert than before, I will offer one observation as a bit of advice: I usually forget people’s names within a minute of being given them. I can’t remember the names of more than a dozen of the 1000+ I’ve met along the way. But I’m not letting that make me worry about my health.